Subtle Glow

While running errands this past weekend I found myself slipping down the slope of “compulsive purchases in response to tears.” And also guilt, because I would just as easily spend that money on myself. In a heartbeat. In fact that’s where we were headed on our next ‘errand’ anyway. Oh - what a lamentable parent am I!

For two years - yes YEARS! My kiddo has been dreaming of a most prized possession. On Saturday, as I trudged through boxes of strewn about shoes and nylon “socks” searching for replacement shoelaces — we came face to face with it: Heelys.

If I do say so myself, I have one of the most well-behaved children when it comes to shopping/begging for purchases. I’m either lucky, or I did a few things right in that area. The child didn’t utter a word - not so much as a peep when he spied the precious footwear. He gingerly fondled boxes as he tried to decipher the coding on the side of the box that would indicate which pair were his size. Meanwhile I kept an eye on him as I rounded row after row of displays looking for the shoelaces.

I really wasn’t planning to buy them. Truth be told, the budget money is only just now smoothing out after a few rough months while I transitioned to my new job, and Kiddo’s dad made feeble attempts at child support payments - payments that conveniently tapered off just when we needed them most. Truth be told - I was spending a tiny bit of this week’s grocery allowance, and a bit of some money that was supposed to go to the gas card next month to pay for them. So. There was that.

I sat him down and very gently explained that these were expensive shoes, and I know how he wanted them, but they were more than likely going to show up under the tree at Christmas, instead of going home with us today.

To his credit, he tried so hard to bear the news gracefully. There was no hysterical pitching of fits, no whining, no shreiking. Just very large, very silent tears filling his eyes and slowly making their way down his cheeks.

What can I say? I caved. Although - he had to make a choice… it was the Heelys or it was the contribution to his school fundraiser. Possibly not the best message - charity over personal posession - but you know, there are worse things. Not to mention at least 4 other fundraisers for the school, this year alone, that we will participate in. The clincher in all of it was the fact that I was totally ready to head over to the mall and buy myself just one more pair of those cute jeans from New York & Co.

I just couldn’t do that. I bought the shoes for him. And it was he who reminded me as we left the store, “I’ve been waiting for these since kindergarten - that’s TWO YEARS!” I have a feeling I would have hated those jeans if I had bought them.

Later that day, while in the grocery store I had to pull him close as I explained to him: “You know, every time you nearly slip and fall in those shoes… I have a small little heart attack. I can’t take the stress! Please - stay off your heels while we’re in the store!”

Not to mention my insurance coverage isn’t effective until tomorrow.

First off, I have been having a little trouble with my phone. I only just upgraded less than a year ago, and I was having a heck of a time downloading a ringtone just the other day.

So I called and spoke with a guy there on the support line… It must have been 9pm on a Friday (such is my life - and THAT is a highlight, too) - and PS? What’s with all the CUTE-sounding reps? That alone makes them winners.

Ok so long story short - they are pretty sure the problem is with my phone.

So, they are going to send me a NEW phone just like it - at no cost to me. It should arrive… get this: TOMORROW. I know! I got to chat up yet another rep yesterday about it.

And to think… it all started because I couldn’t get Kanye as a ringtone.

Last night, I picked up Kiddo from daycare and he mentioned he had something to tell me. He was very mysterious for the two-block ride home - although he refused my every attempt to cajole him into telling me.

He made me wait until we got all the way home. And not just home, like, in the garage. Nope. I had to be in the house and sitting on the couch. Because, as he explained, he not only had something to tell me, but it would also require me to DO something.

Intrigued? Indeed.

So the moment arrived. He proudly showed me his front tooth. A very wiggly, wobbly, hanging-by-a-thread front tooth. It is not his first loose tooth. It is the first of his two front teeth to go, so that’s something. But there’s more.

Quick as that - I realized with a feeling of ‘OH. Crap.’ that I had absolutely NO cash on me. Not ONE shiny quarter, much less two. I actually considered for a fraction of a second the possibility of sneaking out to the store once he fell asleep. Yes Internet - I considered how bad could it be to leave him home, alone, and asleep so that I could get a shiny 50-cent piece to tuck under his pillow.

So, I did what any parent in that situation would do. I very excitedly explained that he should really wait until TOMORROW to loose that tooth. When he asked Why? I gleefully explained that tomorrow would be “Tooth Fairy Tuesday!!!”

Look at this face:

Could you really stand to disappoint it? Me either.

Eyes Wide Open!

This was the kiddo’s first day of 2nd grade (August 2005).

5 miles!!!

The only picture I have so far of my new car…

I’ve had it for a week and two days. I’ve put on about 500 miles since I picked it up. 500 no shifting, no clutch, very happy miles.

I have decided that my blog needs more pictures. I love the template, it is very clean and simple. Which why I haven’t really gone too crazy mucking up the sidebar with this flashy blinky or that shiny whatsit.

I look at my blog sometimes. I know - I write the entries but I do like to look at it. It’s my little niche of serenity.

And, judging by the lack of entries - I’m sure you can guess just how much serenity is lacking in my life these days.

Don’t get me wrong, though - I really do like the fact that I go to work, and I WORK. Pretty much - all day long. I go in and I work straight through, eating lunch at my desk while I work, getting up only for bathroom breaks or meetings or grabbing stuff from the printer. I wouldn’t say that I love it, not yet, but I very much like it.

Of course that means that there isn’t much time for blogging. There really isn’t much time for thinking about blogging. Except while sitting in traffic on the way in, and on the way home. Which is where the pictures come in. If I weren’t so afraid of crashing my shiny new car, I see plenty of stuff that I could blog about using the pictures from my drives. I at least take my camera with me places - so it’s a start.

Last Sunday morning, bright and early, I went down to the dealer and bought me my first BRAND. NEW. CAR.

I got a 2006 Toyota Corolla S. It’s got a leather-wrapped steering wheel, cruise control, power windows/door locks/mirrors, remote keyless entry, 6-disc in dash cd changer, 15″ aluminum alloy wheels, rear spoiler, flared fenders… oooooohweee!! FINALLY I have an automatic transmission. It’s “phantom grey pearl” (aka: GREY) with charcoal interior. No sunroof - but I don’t want one anyway. I never even roll down my windows… I would never use the sunroof.

It’s so freakin new… it has not even arrived from the factory yet!! I think it comes in tomorrow, but in the meantime the wait is killin’ me.

Other good happenings this week: My amazon.com order arrived today - 5 days before it was estimated to arrive. Slightly less exciting than the new car, but good haps anyway, right? Right.

But, did I mention the thing about the car? NEW. Even came with a payment I can actually afford. Also? Did I mention the transmission? AUTOMATIC, BITCHES! I have only been waiting about 15 years for that…

Now you know.

Our first family home.
I still know the address.
We lived on Magnolia Street.
Two blocks from my Elementary School.

I walked to school.
I pictured that neighborhood as I read “Ramona Quimby, Age 8″ and her house was my house, only hers had stairs I think.

There was a huge church that occupied the block between my house and my school.
The church parking lot is where I learned to ride my bike without training wheels.

On the other side of the church parking lot, was my best friend.
We met the first day of kindergarten.
I decided it was a good idea to go to her house after school, without asking permission first or anything.
My mom thought that was a terrible idea.

We used to fly kites in that parking lot.
We rode our bikes and skated on our skates there.

I wasn’t allowed to go beyond the two-block radius by myself.

We lived about three or four blocks from Sycamore Street.
My dad promised me he would take me for a ride down Sycamore Street.
I rode on the back of his bicycle, in one of those bike seats.
I smiled and waved to the people raking their lawns and sweeping their sidewalks.
I don’t know why, but I always loved Sycamore Street.

I was convinced that El Caminos were really called Pontiacs, because one time a boy in my neighborhood told me so.
Even my dad couldn’t convince me otherwise; I stuck to my opinion and continued calling them Pontiacs - much to his irritation.

We lived a few blocks from the community pool.
I hated the kiddie pool out front.
It always seemed slimy and too green and gross.
The big pool had two diving boards, one regular and one high dive.
I jumped off the regular diving board once, on my own.
I nearly drowned.
The lifeguard was too busy rubbing lotion on herself/flirting with boys.
Someone else jumped in and helped me out.

I sometimes wonder if that old house is still there, with the concrete blocks still underneath to keep it off the ground. I guess there wasn’t really a foundation. All of the houses were like that. Sometimes you could hear raccoons or other varmits under the house, scratching under the tub. The last time anyone in my family saw it, it was broken down, and sinking at the bottom.

I always imagine the same type of family lives there. Like we were when we lived there. A young couple, with young children, with money and domestic problems. The families move in there, with the promise of a bright future. They leave broken.

Hope springs there, and is quickly drained away.

Exept for the part where I didn’t really EAT until 3pm or so… I had a large coffee beverage this morning and I was so busy - I just wasn’t hungry.

But still - no chocolate cake for me tonight.

Ok - Gilmore Girls is on tonight. I LOVE that show. Seriously. I so want to BE Lorelai Gilmore. #1 - she is the coolest single mom EVAR. #2 - hello? Can you say fabulous wardrobe?!

However I really like the little hottie that Rori is running around with - though she used to be too goody-good for him. I really think she’s a big fat flake now. Dropping out? of College? Yale, even! Ok, ok - I know it took me a good number of years to get my degree but I still went while I worked my way through. Does girlfriend have a damn J-O-B? WTF with her grandparents? Ok, enough about her. Except, seriously? I hope they make this whole escapade into one of those “have to make your own mistakes sometimes in order to learn the lesson” things. Otherwise I might even have to say she is - dare I say it - unlikeable?

Other than that Rori is just nuttin’ without the mother-daughter banter. Lorelai can banter like nobody’s business. Rori? mmm, not so much.

Off to shuffle the boy-child through the bedtime routine so I can watch uninterrupted!

It is Day 3 of my new plan. I went to the store on Saturday, just like I said I would, and bought lots of fabulous, healthy and carb-friendly food items.

I have eaten chocolate cake with fudgy fudge frosting 2 out of 3 days.

But. Fear not! Eventually the chocolate cake will RUN OUT and be ALL GONE (though I can’t promise exactly HOW that will happen) and then there will be only days of LOW CARB GOODNESS and other days of FAT BURNING GOODNESS which will then lead to LOST WEIGHT GOODNESS.

Most of all don’t forget CLOTHES FITTING AGAIN GOODNESS.

So to recap: Lots and Lots of kinds of GOODNESS coming up. Soon. Like, in a week, I’m sure! Or something like that.